to be thankful.

With everything going on in my life lately, I seem to have set aside my dreams and goals. I set everything aside, and to what .. be miserable? I seem to shut down on some level when things start to get hard. I start to feel like I don't deserve the good things that are happening to me. And things become a mess from there. 

Try to follow me for a second, I promise it all relates. I was looking back at the past year of my life. It has been the most ridiculous adventure of my life. I traveled for 2.5 months overseas, I received straight A's during my most challenging semester, I graduated an entire semester early, I learned to drive, and I made unforgettable memories with incredible friends. I have had a hard time accepting that I deserve these good things in my life, and I tend to dwell on all the things that went wrong.  

So, as I was running last night and pondering all of this, it hit me - where is my gratitude? my faith? my thankful heart? I keep allowing myself to fall into this rut of being miserable, when all I need is a new perspective on this life. Yes, things are hard and no, things probably won't become easy for a while. But why should things become easy? What entitles me to a luxurious and easy life? Absolutely nothing. And I am quite okay with that. 

Running last night reminded me that absolutely everything that I have been given in this life is undeserved. There have been so many times in the past few weeks where all I seem to do is complain. And that is not okay. I have a roof over my head, a bed to sleep on, food in the kitchen, people that love me, and unlimited resources to do whatever I want with my future and education. Next time I think of complaining, I need to remember how blessed I am and that things could always be worse.